*Plaease Read All of This No Skipping*

Hi everyone and Happy Mothers Day i just want to say im sorry for the hold up on the Art im tring my best here i have alot of Art trades and contest pics to do i got alot on my plate and i need to get it off so i can get back to my work and the comic of Shadow lax's and mine but im begging you guys please Stop Asking Me For Art please wait till i give the word that everything is open again once it's open then you can ask and i'll set up the slots again but for now please wait awhile but once i get done with allo this stuff im not gonna jump up and open it right away i have a life and stuff i want to draw im happy you guys want art from me im very pleased but im getting abit tired of it and worn out and it's been kinda well holding me back i use to put up alot of stuff like once a week but i've seen that im putting up less and less art and avatars i miss drawing lots of Shadouge and my other top 3 couples sure my head is full of ideas and some people are giving me ideas for Shadouge but i got no time and im struggling with all this art  and i don't want all this to push me away from DA and make me think all this is taking my favorite stuff away i got things i want to learn like how to make flash i want to make a Shadouge movie or Shadouge clips or my other favorite couplings clips and i have things on photoshop im still tring to learn but with this art wanting from everyone im struggling it's making me unhappy but im not saying im going to cancle the art trades and the contest prizes no i won't do it but once i get all this done it's going to be awhile befor i open them again and im going to have less slots though cuz all of you see how it's taking over me and everything i don't even know who i am anymore i use to get art work done in a snap and have art up alot i use not to take this long i don't remember things being this way if you guys go to my feature art works and look at the dates and see how long it's taking see how all this is taking ove me and kinda making me tired of stuff my art work it's self is all slow im getting depressed and i miss drawing my ideas as soon as the pop up in my head but now i can't do that anymore cuz all this art stuff i gotta do for people i miss it i have alot of ideasto do sure i write them on my ipod and stuff but i sometimes forget and im like omg this idea is awesome i can't wait to share it with my boyfriend,friends and watchers it will be a hit
but then i forget it don't any of you have great ideas then the next thing boom it's gone and i hate it when that happens and it's been happening to me alot and i have at least 7 pics of art work of mine thats done but it hadn't been on photoshop yet sad yes i know

but listen to me im not mad or upset at any of you your all like family to me your my DA family everyone of you that supports me
and you know i support you back and i know alot of you are going through some awful things like i am with my mom thats still sick and some of you could be going through way worse im sorry thats going on i try to be there for you i read your journals but i got no time to comment although i try so it's not you guys thats holding me back it's only the art trades and art wants  that is it's kinda messing me up and i don't want it to put me in a spot to want to leave DA i love this place i grew up here well not as in a baby or anything but i came here in 2006 while i was 16 this place means alot here i found my first love Shadow lax im glad we're still togather and met all my wonderful friends and become a top Shadouge artist that loves Shadouge alot of course theres other great ones and stuff im not the only one Thank God their awesome too but some don't like me but eh oh well thats life lol so anyway i want my life back my DA life at least i want to start putting up lots of my art work again and draw my ideas as soon as i get it and study stuff like i use to guys im telling you im struggling i have neck pains even and when i try to draw a art trade my hand freezes and i don't feel right in my head i hear am i gonna do this forever? has this taken over me? will i ever get to do the things i want anymore? so there you have it right there im tring to do everything but i have all my wants i want to do but i can't do it im getting really unhappy i mean im getting comments like this alot

( Hi Nina how are you can i have a art trade and a RQ? )
it's all theses i want this and i want that what about what i want?
im happy and pleased you love my art style thank you so much but i get tired of doing this want stuff all the time

i never get comments like these maybe i have but...i don't see them anymore ( Hi Nina how are you? when are you going to have more of Your art up do you have any new ideas? whatcha got on your mind? what do you want to do? )i would love to get comments like that again it just sometimes i think people are forgetting why i came to DA

and sure some don't know their new and don't know
me i didn't come here to be a Art trade person all the time sure doing some is nice but letting it take over and control me is not what i came here for I came here to be a great Shadouge Artist
thats what i had on my mind when i came here is that not to be a Art trade person befor i came to DA i had alot of time to think what i want and i knew i said i want to be a great Shadouge artist and i went for it im okay with doing some art trades but i don't want to do it 247 all the time so i have

Good News and Bad News
Good news first i will get all this art done on this
list for you guys i won't cancle it you will get it

Bad News once im done with all these art wants on the list im quiting them for awhile and get back to my art again and do what i want but in other good news the will be open again as promise but only when i want to i won't jump up and open it again very fast it will be awhile i don't know how long but they will come back so keep your stuff to yourself please and wait calmly when i give the word that their open again then you can tell me what you want me to draw you so till then no telling me now i want to stay on DA i don't want to get sick of it and leave it

remember it's not you it's the art wants

Thank you for reading sorry it was long but i had to get this off my chest it needed to be said